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Composer:   Ed Hooke
Date of Composition: September 2013
Date of Recording/Copyright:    2013

Commentary
Emotional endings are rarely easy, particularly when both parties have invested heavily in a relationship  - and even when the ending is mutually agreed.

I’ve used up your toothpaste
and run out of food
I still want to tell you
little things from my day
and hear you sing
round the house at the top of your voice.
That’s you!
Bright-eyed and full of life.
(I miss you) - my exquisite ex-wife
(I miss you)
Just thinking of you greatly grew my grin.
(I miss you)
How did I come to choose
to be loved so well, then to lose?

Hand in hand
we set out.
You’re the one on whom I relied.
I lost you
in the mists
across the fields to Barkingside.

(I’m so sorry, Nojit.  I’m so sorry.)

These days I’m impatient.
Can’t see to sit still.
I’m dreaming of journeys
where I lose my luggage,
screaming at you
and then I realise I lost you too
and it’s hard to breathe.
(Where are you?) and it’s hard to see
(Where are you?)  and it’s hard to be
(Where are you?)  here alone, just me.

Hand in hand
we set out
leaps of faith taken in our stride.
I lost you
in the mists
across the fields to Barkingside.

(I’m so sorry, Nojit.  I’m so sorry.)

A shed from foundations.
Floors laid as a team.
Furniture discussed
and agreed together
Jungle we fought
side by side and shaped a garden new
but the petals have fallen & withered now
(untouched by you)
and the home we built and warmed together
(for me and you) echoes empty, a shadowy shell
(it aches for you)  There is no more ‘me and you’.

Hand in hand
we set out
deeply in mutual faith allied.
I lost you
in the mists
across the fields to Barkingside

(I’m so sorry, Nojit.  I’m so sorry.)

Frozen fragments that you left
slung slippers, bags bereft
a shrine of shreds we’d shared & shed
a silent side of has-been bed.
No Other Joy Is There.

I